Search the site

  

Grab my RSS feed | (What's this?)

Touchline Dad

Touchline Dad

TOUCHLINE Dad is written by Peter Harvey, a newspaper editor with Trinity Mirror Merseyside. Father-of-three Peter, 40, was a writer for the Liverpool Echo during the 1990s and has been editor of Trinity Mirror titles the Crosby Herald, Bootle Times and the Advertiser Series, West Lancashire. Touchline Dad is a lifelong Liverpool fan.

Our Jack...

Jack with his first Man of the Match award

JACK Harvey is seven, going on seventy-seven. He's a dependable, no-nonsense defender for Marine FC's U7s. He's played in the Bootle and Netherton league and Hightown league in north Merseyside. Jack has also played for Crosby Stuart. He is being encouraged to appreciate both Liverpool AND Everton...for now at least.

The Gaffer

The Gaffer

THE Gaffer is a true Blue. She's now swapped her Gwladys Street season ticket for one at the new Liverpool One shopping complex. She still gets steamed up thinking about Graeme Sharp in his skimpy shorts.

Not forgeting...

Emily

EMILY is five and has no interest in football. Her kicks come from dressing up, make-up, bangles and beads. Oh, and shoes. She changes them at least five times a day. Likes ballet, swimming and shopping. Cross her at your peril.

And finally...

Paddy

PADDY inherited a mini Everton kit from Sam down the road. No doubt 'Pads' will also get Jack's pass-me-downs, so that will narrow his allegiance to Real Madrid, Juventus, Republic of Ireland, England, Everton and Liverpool. Loves pirates, Shrek and Wall-e. He's got the second worst temper I know...

Marine AFC

FORMED in 1894 and based in Crosby, north Mersyside. The first team plays in the Northern Premier League and were champions in 1994 and 1995. 220.jpgThey had a famous FA Cup run in the early 1990s, eventually being knocked out by Crewe 3-1 in the 3rd round. Roly Howard was manager for a record 33 years (1972-2005), although he will always be remembered by some fans as Kenny Dalglish's window cleaner. TV presenter Ray Stubbs once asked: "How's business, Roly?" to which Roly replied "Oh you know - ups and downs."

Snapshots

Jack and his Marine U7 teammates
Jack, Carra, Emily, Touchline Dad and the European Cup
Jack, Emily and Paddy
Jack at Goodison Park, 2007
Jack at Anfield, 2007
Jack (stripes) in action for Crosby Stuart
Jack's former team Crosby Stuart U7s

Crosby Stuart

THIS was Jack's first club. It was formed in the early 1970s in north Liverpool and is now one of the biggest and most successful junior football clubs in the North West. Crosby StuartFormer players include Michael Ball (Everton and Rangers) and Stephen Wright (Liverpool and Sunderland). The club motto is 'To Enjoy, Not Destroy.'

Football Crazy

"JACK stood before me in his Buzz Lightyear pyjamas, hands on hips. I kicked him hard in the shins. Instead of falling to the carpet and rolling in agony, he laughed. 'Do it again, Dad. Do it again. We’ll trick Mum.' I didn’t fancy chancing our comedy double act with The Gaffer, so instead Jack clambered into bed still wearing his new 'shinnies.' 'Maybe tomorrow, eh dad?' he asked as he closed his eyes to see his Premier League heroes greet him."

Sponsored links

Recent comments

Recent Posts

Feeds

Categories

Web pals...

Archives

Sponsored links

January 2007 Archives

Grabbing the Headlines

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 30, 2007 7:43 AM

JACK and the boys featured on their club's website with a report on their first match for Crosby Stuart Under-6s.


Andrew rightly got the Man of the Match award for his Alan Hansen-style performance at the heart of the defence.


He's a very mature player already - he watches the ball like a hawk and pounces just at the right moment.


The boys are eagerly awaiting publication of our local paper, the Crosby Herald, on Thursday to read about the game and see their first team photo in print.


Here's what the official match report said about the game...

Dancing Queen

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 29, 2007 8:33 PM

BEING a Touchline Dad means my days of taking little Emily to Saturday morning ballet may be numbered.


While now I stand pitchside trying to sound knowledgeable about the beautiful game, until recently I would proudly walk hand in hand with my little ballerina.


It was always amusing to see other dads, more butch than me (or perhaps less assured of their sexuality), walking with a little pink changing bag tucked under one arm.


Of course the politically stupid would suggest that Jack goes to ballet while Emily kicks lumps out of her mates on a muddy field.


Shall I tell them?


Daddy's little ballerina

Roll over Stan, Here’s Sarah

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 27, 2007 11:13 PM

JUST as I thought. The Gaffer nodded off while watching Poirot. Well, if she must stay up gossiping with the girls until 3am leaving me to do the morning milk run with baby Paddy...


Clambered up to the loft in search of my 1970s football cards.

Dreaming about Stan Bowles

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 27, 2007 8:56 PM

SHARING Jack’s joy at completing his Shootout Premier League cards collection got me reminiscing about my own childhood.


Scurrying up to Norman Hood’s newsagents on the top road on a Sunday afternoon with my pocket money clenched in my right hand.

Football Crazy?

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 27, 2007 6:20 PM

JACK played for his team at eleven o’clock today, turned up late for a football party at around one o’clock, then went for a kickabout with Charlie, Ben and Isaac in the park at three o’clock and was knocking penalties past Paddy, his two-year-old baby brother, in the bay window using a foam ball at five o’clock.


Tomorrow’s another football party. Same place, different time.


And, I know what his first words will be when he stirs in the morning.


“Dad, what time’s Match of the Day on?�

Sharks Snatch Late Win

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 27, 2007 1:22 PM

JACK sat in the driver’s seat of the car, his stumpy legs protruding out of the door as I laced up his polished boots.


Over my shoulder there were perhaps a dozen matches underway. Jack strained to see what was going on. Shouts and whistles echoed in the crisp, January air.


I could tell from his worried look that this was bigger, far noisier and more serious than Jack had expected.


“Look Dad, referees. Will we have a referee? What about two halves? I mean, changing ends at half-time like on telly?�


Jack's first team photo - Crosby Stuart U6s


Here we go, here we go (again)

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 26, 2007 8:17 PM

LAST weekend’s weather-hit match is re-arranged for tomorrow.


Crosby Stuart U6s v The Sharks. Kick-off 11 o’clock.


The lads have got a brand new kit plus jackets sturdy enough to survive an Everest expedition.


Kids’ footie simply couldn’t survive without firms stepping in as sponsors.


Weather forecast is good so I think Jack’s journey to the Premiership could finally get underway.

Clean as a whistle

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 25, 2007 4:12 PM

Jack: ‘Dad, I’ve finished my tea. Can I go and play Football Manager 2007 on the computer?

Dad: ‘Don’t believe you. Show me your plate.’

Jack: ‘Look. Clean as a whistle – just like my sliding tackles.’

Dad: ‘What are you on about, son?’

Jack: ‘On the footy game. The commentator says ‘What a good tackle! That was clean as a whistle.’’

Thank God for Mums

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 25, 2007 10:54 AM

JACK’S disappearing shin pads threatened to cause a training ground bust-up (again). He sprang out of the car looking sheepish.


As he skipped away towards his team-mates I noticed he was minus his wretched shinnies.


In Mike Riley fashion I called him back.


‘I haven’t lost them,’ he pleaded. ‘I just don’t know where they are. But it’s OK, Mum does.’


Referee Mike Riley

Parlour Games

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 24, 2007 7:25 PM

I NEVER thought I’d be so pleased to see Ray Parlour.


For three years I’ve found it hard to forgive him for cheating his way to a free kick in front of the Kop. Arsenal scored and went on to win the game. ‘Let it go. These things can eat you up,’ I tell myself.


Frizzy-headed Ray Parlour


Worra You Looking At?

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 24, 2007 7:06 AM

I COULD hear sniggering from some of the mums along the touchline the other evening and I felt their eyes upon me.


It continued in bursts for what seemed an age as my cheeks blushed.


‘Just keep your eyes on the ball. Don’t react,’ I told myself.


Double Trouble

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 23, 2007 8:07 AM

‘I’VE found something you’ll be pleased about,’ said Jack revealing two grubby shin pads from behind his back.


A few weeks ago he had lost one, which is as much use as losing two. These are his original shinnies, not his Robocop-style replacements bought by his soft dad for nine quid during a frantic lunch hour.


‘Ah, fantastic,’ I said. ‘At least you’ve now got two pairs to lose.’

Like father, like son

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 22, 2007 4:12 PM

TOUCHLINE dads can talk nonsense (I should know) – and behave appallingly.


At one of Jack’s first training sessions, many months ago now, there was a loud fella who paced up and down shouting instructions to his son.

Numbers Game

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 22, 2007 4:06 PM

PROOF that Jack is watching too much sport on TV.


As we sat in church he nudged me, nodded at the board featuring the numbers of the day’s hymns before whispering: ‘515. Sky Sports News.’


Sky Sports News


What's in a Name?

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 21, 2007 11:06 PM

JACK’S pretty good at remembering and pronouncing footballers’ names.


I was very proud at Anfield the other week when he asked me if Stelios Giannakopoulous was playing for Bolton. I had hoped all 10,000 people in the Main Stand were eavesdropping on our conversation.


Admittedly, Wayne Rooney was Wayne Wooney for a while and Momo Sissoko was Momo Sikoko.


But it’s Thierry Henry who has caused him the biggest problem, so much so that I’m beginning to think he believes the French master is called Tin Hairy Henry.


I’ll be sad the day he gets it right.


Tin Hairy Henry


The World Must Wait

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 21, 2007 7:15 AM

MOTHER Nature dealt a cruel blow to the start of six-year-old Jack’s journey to the Premiership.


A glance under the living room net curtains at 8am didn’t bode well. The wind was howling and the TV weather forecast was not promising.


Soon after 9am, the phone rang. It was coach Mark to confirm that the match was off.


Jack was already dressed and ready to roll. He stood near me listening intently to one side of the short conversation.


As I turned to tell him the bad news and explain that the football world will have to wait seven more days for his debut, he dashed to the back room and into the comforting arms of The Gaffer.

Big Day Beckons

Posted by Peter Harvey on January 20, 2007 8:02 AM

JACK stood before me in his Buzz Lightyear pyjamas, hands on hips. I kicked him hard in the shins. Instead of falling to the carpet and rolling in agony, he laughed.


‘Do it again, Dad. Do it again. We’ll trick Mum.’


Buzz Lightyear

This page contains an archive of all entries posted to Touchline Dad in the January 2007. They are listed from oldest to newest.

February 2007 is the next archive.

Many more can be found on the home page or by looking through the archives.